ARE YOU FABULOUS???
What is holding you back?
What is holding you back from making the changes you need to make in your life?
“If you always do what you have always done, then you will always get what you always got!”
If your life or health is not what you want it to be then you and only you can change it! You can’t keep doing the same thing you’ve always done and expect it to change.
Healing, wellness and feeling fabulous is a journey. To be the fabulous you that you deserve to be you must make true change in your life. You must start your journey. You must embrace change.
Two things hold us back from making change: “Fear” and “Lack of Trust”
To embrace change you may have to face your fears.
Fear can be protective, but what about when it keeps you from living the life you dream. What can you do about fear? How can you overcome it?
What are you afraid of?
Do this exercise! It will change your life.
Write down on a piece of paper all the things you are afraid of. List them one by one. It can be a short list or long, but be honest. Then burn the list. Place it in a tin can with a glass of water near by and watch the paper slowly burn. Take a deep breath and let the ritual engulf you. Let it go. Let it all go! This is the first step. Then use the tips that follow to live your life in love and trust—NOT FEAR!
1. Face your fear to become stronger. SERIOUSLY? Or not?
Don’t take your fear so seriously. You might think to yourself that what you thought was a fear before wasn’t that much to be afraid of at all. Everything is relative. And every triumph, problem, fear and experience becomes bigger or smaller depending to what you compare it to.
But to gain a wider perspective of human experience and grow you really have to step up and face your fear.
2. Take action and get busy.
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” Dale Carnegie
Waiting and worrying about the fear helps nothing. Rally your troops. Get input from others. Make contact with the fear. Get in it’s face.
“Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.”Swedish proverb
99% of the things we worry about happening, never happen and 99% of the things that happen, that we should have worried about, we never thought of.
3. Focus on Love
When you hold others and make physical contact a hormone called oxtocin is released in the brain. This is the love hormone that helps moms to be affectionate and cuddle their babies. It is thought to be deficient in those with anxiety disorders and those with focus disorders or chronic pain, all physical manifestations of fear and lack of trust.
Here are ways to naturally boost your body's oxytocin production:
Hugs-Just embracing others, holding hands, or draping an arm around your significant other, child, or person you care for can produce an increase in oxytocin.
Make eye contact-When you interact with others oxytocin can be enhanced with mental embrace as well as physical contact.
Passion-Adults seeking an oxytocin surge should head for the bedroom. The hugging and touching during foreplay fires up the love chemical, and orgasm spikes the hormone level to two times the normal amount. This opens the door to a relaxed feeling and a greater opportunity to bond with your partner.
Get your hormones balanced-Interestingly, among premenopausal women, oxytocin is naturally higher during ovulation because estrogen intensifies the love hormone. This may partially explain why women seem to be more prone to touch and other displays of affection during ovulation.
Daydream-Research out of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill discovered that happily married women quickly released a dose of oxytocin when asked to think about their husbands.
Get a pet- A loyal pet is there to make owners feel good and because the release of oxytocin is triggered by touch, petting a dog or cat you love can also increase oxytocin levels.
Get comfortable-Remember the smell of your mother's cookies, hearing kind words from someone you care about, telling someone how much you appreciate them, take a walk with a loved one—these are all ways to boost oxytocin.
You can also get oxytocin supplements if you have severe anxiety or fear issues.
4. Fear is often based on false interpretation or miscommunication.
As humans, it is our nature to look for patterns. The problem is just that we often find negative and not so helpful patterns in our lives based on just one or two experiences. Or by misjudging situations. Or through some silly miscommunication. Our brains make neuronal connections to past events. It is important not to judge past experience on future interations. Every situation is different. We transfer a lot of fear and misgivings into future situations that we should really approach with a fresh perspective.
5. Don’t cling to your illusion of safety. The only thing permanent is change and there is no “comfort zone”.
One big reason why people don’t face their fears is because they think they are safe where they are right now. But the truth is safety is only a sense, like fear, it is not real only perceived. There is no safety out there really. It is all uncertain and unknown.
Life happens, you may lose your job, your loved one, have to move, lose your home or suffer unknown tragedy. You may get laid off. You will eventually die. Who knows what will happen?
This perception of safety is not always a bad thing. It’s protective. But there is also not that much point in clinging to an illusion of safety. So you need to find balance where you don’t obsessed by the uncertainty but also recognize that it is there and live accordingly.
As you stop clinging to your safety life also becomes a whole lot more exciting and interesting. You are no longer as confined by an illusion and realize that you set your limits for what you can do and to a large extent create your own freedom in the world. You are no longer building walls to keep yourself safe as those walls wouldn’t protect you anyway.
6. Be curious.
“Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.” James Stephens
When you are stuck in fear you are closed up. You tend to create division in your world and mind. You create barriers between you and other things/people.
How do you become more curious? One way is to remember how life has become more fun in the past thanks to your curiosity and to remember all the cool things it helped to discover and experience. And then to work at it. Curiosity is a habit. The more curious you are the more curious you become. And over time it becomes more of a natural part of you.
7. Trust the antidote to fear.
“Who sees all beings in his own self, and his own self in all beings, loses all fear.”Isa Upanishad, Hindu Scripture
Most of our fears are based on how others perceive us.
The ego wants to divide your world. It wants to create barriers, separation and loves to play the comparison game. The game where people are different compare to you, the game where you are better than someone and worse than someone else. All of that creates fear. Doing the opposite removes fear.
But one thought you may want to try for a day is that everyone you meet is your friend. To take this one step further assume that every one you meet has something to teach you.
There is often an underlying frame of mind in interactions. Either it asks us how we are different to this person. Or how we are the same as this person. This creates warmth, an openness and curiosity within. There is no place to focus on fear or judgment anymore.
This is of course not easy, especially if you have held the first frame of mind for many years. But you can get insight into this by doing the rest of the things above. As you face your fears the barriers and separation you have built in your mind decreases. You come closer and feel more of a connection to other people.
With action, curiousness and understanding we come closer to each other. We gain a greater understanding of ourselves and others. And so it becomes easier to see them in you. And you in them.
Make your change. Don’t hold on to your illness and your fear. Start the journey to a new you today! A fabulous YOU.
What is holding you back?
What is holding you back from making the changes you need to make in your life?
“If you always do what you have always done, then you will always get what you always got!”
If your life or health is not what you want it to be then you and only you can change it! You can’t keep doing the same thing you’ve always done and expect it to change.
Healing, wellness and feeling fabulous is a journey. To be the fabulous you that you deserve to be you must make true change in your life. You must start your journey. You must embrace change.
Two things hold us back from making change: “Fear” and “Lack of Trust”
To embrace change you may have to face your fears.
Fear can be protective, but what about when it keeps you from living the life you dream. What can you do about fear? How can you overcome it?
What are you afraid of?
Do this exercise! It will change your life.
Write down on a piece of paper all the things you are afraid of. List them one by one. It can be a short list or long, but be honest. Then burn the list. Place it in a tin can with a glass of water near by and watch the paper slowly burn. Take a deep breath and let the ritual engulf you. Let it go. Let it all go! This is the first step. Then use the tips that follow to live your life in love and trust—NOT FEAR!
1. Face your fear to become stronger. SERIOUSLY? Or not?
Don’t take your fear so seriously. You might think to yourself that what you thought was a fear before wasn’t that much to be afraid of at all. Everything is relative. And every triumph, problem, fear and experience becomes bigger or smaller depending to what you compare it to.
But to gain a wider perspective of human experience and grow you really have to step up and face your fear.
2. Take action and get busy.
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” Dale Carnegie
Waiting and worrying about the fear helps nothing. Rally your troops. Get input from others. Make contact with the fear. Get in it’s face.
“Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.”Swedish proverb
99% of the things we worry about happening, never happen and 99% of the things that happen, that we should have worried about, we never thought of.
3. Focus on Love
When you hold others and make physical contact a hormone called oxtocin is released in the brain. This is the love hormone that helps moms to be affectionate and cuddle their babies. It is thought to be deficient in those with anxiety disorders and those with focus disorders or chronic pain, all physical manifestations of fear and lack of trust.
Here are ways to naturally boost your body's oxytocin production:
Hugs-Just embracing others, holding hands, or draping an arm around your significant other, child, or person you care for can produce an increase in oxytocin.
Make eye contact-When you interact with others oxytocin can be enhanced with mental embrace as well as physical contact.
Passion-Adults seeking an oxytocin surge should head for the bedroom. The hugging and touching during foreplay fires up the love chemical, and orgasm spikes the hormone level to two times the normal amount. This opens the door to a relaxed feeling and a greater opportunity to bond with your partner.
Get your hormones balanced-Interestingly, among premenopausal women, oxytocin is naturally higher during ovulation because estrogen intensifies the love hormone. This may partially explain why women seem to be more prone to touch and other displays of affection during ovulation.
Daydream-Research out of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill discovered that happily married women quickly released a dose of oxytocin when asked to think about their husbands.
Get a pet- A loyal pet is there to make owners feel good and because the release of oxytocin is triggered by touch, petting a dog or cat you love can also increase oxytocin levels.
Get comfortable-Remember the smell of your mother's cookies, hearing kind words from someone you care about, telling someone how much you appreciate them, take a walk with a loved one—these are all ways to boost oxytocin.
You can also get oxytocin supplements if you have severe anxiety or fear issues.
4. Fear is often based on false interpretation or miscommunication.
As humans, it is our nature to look for patterns. The problem is just that we often find negative and not so helpful patterns in our lives based on just one or two experiences. Or by misjudging situations. Or through some silly miscommunication. Our brains make neuronal connections to past events. It is important not to judge past experience on future interations. Every situation is different. We transfer a lot of fear and misgivings into future situations that we should really approach with a fresh perspective.
5. Don’t cling to your illusion of safety. The only thing permanent is change and there is no “comfort zone”.
One big reason why people don’t face their fears is because they think they are safe where they are right now. But the truth is safety is only a sense, like fear, it is not real only perceived. There is no safety out there really. It is all uncertain and unknown.
Life happens, you may lose your job, your loved one, have to move, lose your home or suffer unknown tragedy. You may get laid off. You will eventually die. Who knows what will happen?
This perception of safety is not always a bad thing. It’s protective. But there is also not that much point in clinging to an illusion of safety. So you need to find balance where you don’t obsessed by the uncertainty but also recognize that it is there and live accordingly.
As you stop clinging to your safety life also becomes a whole lot more exciting and interesting. You are no longer as confined by an illusion and realize that you set your limits for what you can do and to a large extent create your own freedom in the world. You are no longer building walls to keep yourself safe as those walls wouldn’t protect you anyway.
6. Be curious.
“Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.” James Stephens
When you are stuck in fear you are closed up. You tend to create division in your world and mind. You create barriers between you and other things/people.
How do you become more curious? One way is to remember how life has become more fun in the past thanks to your curiosity and to remember all the cool things it helped to discover and experience. And then to work at it. Curiosity is a habit. The more curious you are the more curious you become. And over time it becomes more of a natural part of you.
7. Trust the antidote to fear.
“Who sees all beings in his own self, and his own self in all beings, loses all fear.”Isa Upanishad, Hindu Scripture
Most of our fears are based on how others perceive us.
The ego wants to divide your world. It wants to create barriers, separation and loves to play the comparison game. The game where people are different compare to you, the game where you are better than someone and worse than someone else. All of that creates fear. Doing the opposite removes fear.
But one thought you may want to try for a day is that everyone you meet is your friend. To take this one step further assume that every one you meet has something to teach you.
There is often an underlying frame of mind in interactions. Either it asks us how we are different to this person. Or how we are the same as this person. This creates warmth, an openness and curiosity within. There is no place to focus on fear or judgment anymore.
This is of course not easy, especially if you have held the first frame of mind for many years. But you can get insight into this by doing the rest of the things above. As you face your fears the barriers and separation you have built in your mind decreases. You come closer and feel more of a connection to other people.
With action, curiousness and understanding we come closer to each other. We gain a greater understanding of ourselves and others. And so it becomes easier to see them in you. And you in them.
Make your change. Don’t hold on to your illness and your fear. Start the journey to a new you today! A fabulous YOU.
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