Fear is Potential!
Have you ever wished you had more self confidence?
I watched my son at the outdoor mall yesterday. The perfect October weather had us in a great mood. They had four large trampolines set up with bungee cords. He begged me to let him try. I wasn’t sure it was all that safe so the cautious girl that I am, I walked up and inspected the whole operation very closely. After a few minutes and watching the children who were already participating, I felt pretty comfortable letting him give it a go. My niece suited up in the harness first. She is a dare devil six year old, not afraid of much and promptly took her place high in the sky. I smelled movie popcorn waft by from the nearby theatre, mixed with the fall air, and for a moment was distracted until I saw her flipping madly in the harness. She looked like a graceful gymnast bouncing on the trampoline and flying into flip upon flip.
My son, who is seven made his way to the platform, his skinny little legs peeping out of the harness made me smile. He got hooked up and soon he was imitating her flips and showed no fear.
What is it in us that is so fearless as children and that takes us years to undo until we find ourselves terrified to even get out of bed some mornings?
I believe that where there is fear there is potential. Where your fears are that is where your growth comes from.
If we never face our fears then we cannot grow. So how do we, at this stage in the game face our fears? We build confidence. And, how do we do that?
Well, there are two ways. One is the indirect and one is the direct way. The indirect way focuses on borrowing confidence from others and drawing energy from others to build your confidence. This can be very ineffective. You might stay late and work hard for a pat on the back. You might interrupt others to show how smart you are. You might overpromise (which usually leads to under delivery). You might ask for opinions when you are more competent to make the decision yourself.
The direct approach is drawing confidence from within ones self. How do you do this? Some specific ways include making a core vision and goal for yourself, your current project, and your overall work ethic. You can take classes and educate yourself as much as you can about your line of work or what ever it is that you want to be better at. Improve your skills and competencies. You must be patient to build the foundation so that you can grow from it. As you educate yourself you will propel yourself beyond your competition and beyond your co-workers. You will have confidence to take on new tasks when you understand more about what you are capable of doing. Even if your corporation doesn’t pay you take more classes or educate yourself, do it anyway. Learn as much as you can. Learning, understanding and trust are all the ultimate antidotes to fear. When you start to feel afraid or slip back into the grasp of your fear go back to your core vision and goal. Focus on yourself for the answers. Stay late to learn more about what you do and how to do it better, not for the pat on the back. Your disappointment from lack of appreciation will only slow you down. Never over promise, rather over deliver. Ask for opinions when you can truly learn something from others, not to stroke egos. Make decisions when you are competent to do so and never underestimate your competency when you have done your part to understand and educate yourself about what you are doing
Your health is very similar. The indirect approach to getting healthier is to keep saying you are going to do certain things to take care of your health for the pat on the back but not actually changing your behaviors to improve your health. You can over promise that you will cut out sodas and cut down on carbohydrates but then you underdeliver to yourself because you have no intention of following through. You ask others how to get healthy but then don’t make the changes.
The direct approach to your health is to make a core vision for your health and specific goals. Educate and empower yourself to make those changes. Stop waiting for the right time and if you make mistakes, don’t use them as an excuse to quit trying. Your fear of embarrassing yourself at the gym is an indirect approach, whereas the direct approach is to make a goal for your health and not care what others at the gym think about the way you might poke out of your gym shorts a little. The direct way is to learn what your strengths are and to empower yourself to make changes. Do not to look to others to influence you or direct you.
Start today and don’t wait. List your goals, lose 20 lbs., have the energy to chase my kids, be able to wear a certain size by Christmas.
Face your fears! Build your confidence by building your goals and developing your vision. Then you can truly be FABULOUS!
Have you ever wished you had more self confidence?
I watched my son at the outdoor mall yesterday. The perfect October weather had us in a great mood. They had four large trampolines set up with bungee cords. He begged me to let him try. I wasn’t sure it was all that safe so the cautious girl that I am, I walked up and inspected the whole operation very closely. After a few minutes and watching the children who were already participating, I felt pretty comfortable letting him give it a go. My niece suited up in the harness first. She is a dare devil six year old, not afraid of much and promptly took her place high in the sky. I smelled movie popcorn waft by from the nearby theatre, mixed with the fall air, and for a moment was distracted until I saw her flipping madly in the harness. She looked like a graceful gymnast bouncing on the trampoline and flying into flip upon flip.
My son, who is seven made his way to the platform, his skinny little legs peeping out of the harness made me smile. He got hooked up and soon he was imitating her flips and showed no fear.
What is it in us that is so fearless as children and that takes us years to undo until we find ourselves terrified to even get out of bed some mornings?
I believe that where there is fear there is potential. Where your fears are that is where your growth comes from.
If we never face our fears then we cannot grow. So how do we, at this stage in the game face our fears? We build confidence. And, how do we do that?
Well, there are two ways. One is the indirect and one is the direct way. The indirect way focuses on borrowing confidence from others and drawing energy from others to build your confidence. This can be very ineffective. You might stay late and work hard for a pat on the back. You might interrupt others to show how smart you are. You might overpromise (which usually leads to under delivery). You might ask for opinions when you are more competent to make the decision yourself.
The direct approach is drawing confidence from within ones self. How do you do this? Some specific ways include making a core vision and goal for yourself, your current project, and your overall work ethic. You can take classes and educate yourself as much as you can about your line of work or what ever it is that you want to be better at. Improve your skills and competencies. You must be patient to build the foundation so that you can grow from it. As you educate yourself you will propel yourself beyond your competition and beyond your co-workers. You will have confidence to take on new tasks when you understand more about what you are capable of doing. Even if your corporation doesn’t pay you take more classes or educate yourself, do it anyway. Learn as much as you can. Learning, understanding and trust are all the ultimate antidotes to fear. When you start to feel afraid or slip back into the grasp of your fear go back to your core vision and goal. Focus on yourself for the answers. Stay late to learn more about what you do and how to do it better, not for the pat on the back. Your disappointment from lack of appreciation will only slow you down. Never over promise, rather over deliver. Ask for opinions when you can truly learn something from others, not to stroke egos. Make decisions when you are competent to do so and never underestimate your competency when you have done your part to understand and educate yourself about what you are doing
Your health is very similar. The indirect approach to getting healthier is to keep saying you are going to do certain things to take care of your health for the pat on the back but not actually changing your behaviors to improve your health. You can over promise that you will cut out sodas and cut down on carbohydrates but then you underdeliver to yourself because you have no intention of following through. You ask others how to get healthy but then don’t make the changes.
The direct approach to your health is to make a core vision for your health and specific goals. Educate and empower yourself to make those changes. Stop waiting for the right time and if you make mistakes, don’t use them as an excuse to quit trying. Your fear of embarrassing yourself at the gym is an indirect approach, whereas the direct approach is to make a goal for your health and not care what others at the gym think about the way you might poke out of your gym shorts a little. The direct way is to learn what your strengths are and to empower yourself to make changes. Do not to look to others to influence you or direct you.
Start today and don’t wait. List your goals, lose 20 lbs., have the energy to chase my kids, be able to wear a certain size by Christmas.
Face your fears! Build your confidence by building your goals and developing your vision. Then you can truly be FABULOUS!
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